Marriage
Pastor Kong, 10 Feb
Genesis 2
§ Marriage is the first institute – it was not an afterthought, it existed before Man fell and salvation was available
§ It is not part of God’s salvation – You don’t need it to be saved – that is why it is available to all
Ecc 9:9
§ Marriage is a piece of Heaven on earth available to all, even the lost
Roles & Responsibilities of the Husband
Eph 5:22-25
§ Marriage is so important on earth because it is a symbol of the relationship between us and God as well
§ When we say that our marriage doesn’t work, we are saying that our relationship with God will not work.
§ We need to make sure it works!
1. To be the leader
- Christ is the Prophet, Prince and King à likewise husbands to their wives
- As the Prophet: Husbands have to show the way
- Jesus healed 7 blind MEN. This shows that husbands – MEN – need to be the one with the vision, because the head (king) is where the eyes (vision) are.
- .: Men need to grow more and more in the Lord so that he can lead
- As the King: Husbands have to carry themselves with nobility
- Nobility meaning that husbands should be a gentleman, not abusive, and not curse and swear
- As the King: Husbands need to be like the Holy Spirit – To lead, to drive, to rule and reign his household wisely.
2. To love his wife
- Love unconditionally, selflessly, sacrificially
- Every time we backslide in our hearts, God grieves but because He loves us, He will forgive, that He will be faithful even though we are unfaithful.
- Similarly, a husband should love his wife like how God loves us.
Roles & Responsibilities of the Wife
Genesis 2: 18 “it is not good that men should be alone”
§ It was the first time that God said that something is not good
§ When God created Man, He gave him a job à Men need jobs
§ But by being alone, Adam will not have a healthy character
§ God made Eve because God is more concerned about developing Adam’s character than his job
1. To be a helper
- In achieving her husband’s visions and dreams
- Hence, wives need to be thoroughly familiar with their husbands’ visions and dreams
- The wife must believe in the husband
- Thus, the wife is the dream enabler, no the dream thief!
2. To submit
- Eph 5
- To submit does not mean in a controlling way, but to be supportive and honouring towards their husbands
- Women respond positively to agape love
- This is seen by how God LOVED US FIRST, so if husbands loved their wives first, wives will see that love and respond positively to it.
- .: God holds us responsible for that relationship
- Romans 5:12 “through one man sin entered the world”
- This “one man” is not mankind as a whole, but A MALE. Because of the husband, it can cause the woman to turn against her true nature and sin.
- Genesis 3:6 (NIV) “and gave some to her husband, WHO WAS WITH HER”
- Hence, Adam saw Eve talking to the snake and eating the apple, but he did nothing about it
- 1 Tim 2:13-15
- Adam was given the revelation, what would happen if one were to eat the fruit, and not Eve.
Story of Judah and Tamar
Genesis 38:1-26
Show the failure of a group of husbands that led to a woman to do desperate things.
Judah had 3 sons. Er had to be a terrible husband to Tamar for God to kill him. Dhan, had to marry Tamar by “Levirate marriage” (Lavir lat: husband’s brother) for Tamar to produce a son to have a heir to his brother’s lineage. However, Dhan did not give Tamar a child on purpose. He was greedy and plotting. He took advantage of Tamar (Note: Lust is the desire to get at the expense of others) without taking responsibility.
“Maturity does not come with age. It comes with responsibility” – Dr Edwin Cole
Husbands, if you do not give your wife what is due to her –her security etc. – she is going to get it with or without your help.
(v14) Man can cause women to compromise on their virtues and integrity, to be a manipulative woman, to demean herself to get what is rightfully hers. Like Tamar, women do not expect men to be perfect – she wanted them to be responsible.
(v19) Tamar had to keep changing personalities – righteous woman, widow, prostitute.
(v20) Judah will keep a promise to a prostitute rather than to Tamar. And this is true in today’s world – men will provide nice houses and buy jewellery for their mistresses but not keep their promise to their wives.
(v26) Turning point. Judah knew why Tamar did what she did and took responsibility at last. Although Judah had failed, he repented. And because he repented, centuries later, Jesus was born from this lineage.
